Are you one of the millions of people who experience sleep issues?
Do you feel exhausted even when you have had a long sleep? Is bad sleep affecting different areas of your life?
Do you want a greater understanding of sleep and to have a whole box of tools to improve it?
Read my latest blog on all things sleep-related. For all neurotypes.
Sleep issues
In my family, my father and I have been the only members not to have sleep problems – seriously – and for a whole range of reasons. When I did my training to become a Hypnotherapist and now Psychotherapist, I was fascinated by sleep and why so many people have challenges, so I took a deep dive into sleep research and hope that the following blog will support you and enable you to accept your unique sleeping patterns while finding ways to get better sleep.
I wonder how long you have had difficulties with your sleep? Has it been your whole life, at different times, or in later life? What are the difficulties? Is it that you are a night owl or an early bird? Perhaps your partner has a different sleeping pattern to you?
You may find it hard to get off to sleep, wake during the night or find it tough getting up in the morning. Are you at your best at 3am in the morning? Maybe you prefer shift work? Have you found what works for you? Let’s talk about insomnia, stress, sleeping aids, relationships and sleep hygiene.
Stress and sleep
In my therapy room, top of the list when working with clients is the topic of stress, and so many clients tell me about how bad their sleep is. It doesn’t take long to uncover a number of stressors which add to their problems around sleep.
I know that when I am stressed, I sleep badly. I did a recent blog about The Emotional Needs Audit, and you can do it for yourself here to see how anxious, stressed or depressed you feel.
Imagine you are going through a stressful time and you’re in bed, negative thoughts and worries racing through your head. Not a great start to the next seven hours of sleep, is it? Looking at the bigger picture, by reducing the stress in your life, you can improve sleep.
If you are feeling stressed, seeing a counsellor, even for a few sessions, can help enormously. All therapists should have great tips about how to improve sleep. I recommend the Counselling Directory or Psychology Today for professional and vetted therapists.
Here are some sleep solutions for adults
- Allow your body to wind down at least thirty minutes before sleep
- Take a warm bath or shower to relax you
- Listen to calming sleep meditations
- Keep a journal by your bed. Get what’s in your head onto paper
Exercise and sleep
Many of you have very busy lives with responsibilities and demands put on you. You can only do the best you can, so don’t beat yourself up and show yourself some compassion.
Your only time to exercise might be in the evening. The difficulty with this is, if you exercise too late, your body is pumped up, so it’s important to allow yourself a period of time for your muscles to relax and your heart and breathing to calm right down before bed—ideally giving yourself two hours after exercise and before bed.
Eating, drinking and sleeping
It isn’t difficult to find podcasters giving lots of advice on the best ways to feed yourself, keep you hydrated, share fasting strategies and advise on sugar levels and sleep. You may need to feed your kids and put them to bed before you eat. Perhaps you work late, so you eat late. Unfortunately, this can impact your quality of sleep.
When you eat late, your metabolism is working hard to digest food, so if you go to bed soon after eating, it’s like a factory going full blast. You might also feel hungry just before bed and wake up starving, so what can you do about this?
A trick that can help with weight loss and keeping glucose/sugar levels down is to eat your evening meal as early as possible and allow sixteen hours before your next meal. That first meal of the day works very well when it is protein first, avoiding fruit juices and high volumes of carbs. Think eggs, avocado, lean meats and beans. If you feel hungry before bedtime, complex carbs are best. Cherries, a banana, kiwi fruit or peanut butter on wholemeal or sourdough toast work well.
Generally speaking, men need around 3 litres of water/liquids a day and women 2 litres. This is all very well, but if you drink too much water, let’s say after 6pm, then don’t be surprised if you need to get up in the night to pee. Try limiting your water intake after 6pm-ish.
When you get up in the morning, how about making the first thing you consume a big glass of water? A squeeze of lemon in it will flush out your system and get your metabolism going. Caffeine is great to get you started in the early part of the day, but not so great later. Have you ever thought of going decaf? It’s worked wonders for me.
Rather than gulping down water, it’s good to have a water bottle close by to sip during the day, making your last drink a couple of hours before bed so you can pee before sleep.
Alcohol does not help sleep. It dehydrates the body. This might mean waking in the night very thirsty, disturbing your sleep cycle. Waking with a fuzzy head is often down to dehydration, and who likes a hangover? It’s just being aware that when you want a drink, go for it, but maybe think about how you will feel the next day.
Preparing for Sleep
Screens. It can be tricky not having your phone in the bedroom. How are you supposed to listen to the calming meditations without one? It’s more about the content you are consuming. If you are scrolling scary news stories or going down a rabbit hole researching a health issue, your brain will be full at the time it should really be calming down.
It does take practice to reduce screen time before bed. I know that for myself. Many of us need to look at our phones before sleep. It’s about working with what you can manage. Any reduction of screen time will benefit you. It’s the same for reading. If you are in the middle of an exciting thriller or scary horror book, the same applies.
The room you sleep in
These tips are ideal. I won’t be a hypocrite and say I get all these right, because I don’t. I am trying, and that’s the best I can manage. Seriously, though, these tips can help a lot.
- Keeping pets out of the bedroom
- Keeping the room on the cool side
- Making the room dark. Blackout blinds/curtains are great
- No TV in the bedroom
- Ensuring the mattress is the best for your body. Turning it every now and then
- Keeping the room quiet. If affordable, get double glazing
More tips for a good night’s sleep
Here are a few more strategies you may want to try. You might relate to the difficulties around menopause, snoring, teeth grinding or clenching, sinus issues or rhinitis, sleep apnoea, muscle or skeletal issues, gut problems and more. All can affect sleep.
Sleep is so important for our mental and physical health. Anything you can do to improve it, however small, is a bonus to better health.
Maybe speak to your GP. When you can explain your symptoms, you might discover that there is a simple solution. If sleep is a very big problem, a short course of medication can help. This needs the correct management so as not to become reliant on sleeping pills.
If you are neurodivergent, you may naturally have a very different sleeping pattern from the majority of the population. It is so hard to conform to sleeping patterns which just don’t suit twenty per cent of the population. This ranges from the education system to work practices. In an ideal world, you would go to school later, perhaps or work during the night if that’s what you need. Sadly, this ain’t gonna happen any time soon, and I feel for you.
Everyone is unique with different needs when it comes to sleep. There is so much more to explore on this topic. If you are having sleep challenges and want support, then please get in touch, and we can arrange a free twenty-minute phone consult. I offer online or face-to-face counselling and coaching.
Here’s to a better night’s sleep.
Sweet dreams…